My Poems

This Time

This time I’ll be stronger,
This time I’ll let myself cry.
I don’t need to be their soldier.
They are far stronger than I.

His decree is perfect, beautiful.
His hikmah is justified.
I am doubtless he’ll protect me,
Yet for them I’m too scared to cry.

He won’t test me beyond my ability to bear,
So I stand, courageous and strong.
Have I forgotten that he is their Lord too?
Who was protecting them all along?

And here I am on my white horse and sword,
Raging battle against his decree.
In that cupboard I jumped from bereaved to bereaved,
As though their only protection was me.

This time I’ll be stronger.
This time I’ll let myself cry.
Allah pillared each of us.
How arrogant am I?

Who wants to live for ever?
Who wants to live for ever?

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